I'm not sure if I mentioned this already but if anything I'll say it again. In reading my past diaries, I realized that when I was younger I always wrote a play-by-play of my encounters, and as I got older I wrote less about what happened and more of just my feelings.. Well in the interest of having something decent to read ten years from now, I am trying to be more elaborate in my entries when things happen in life.

So we'll start with this.

Ok this is weird, this is new for me. Well its new for me now..

As the holidays were nearing an end, I received a random Facebook message from a guy that went to university with me. It was funny timing because over the holidays I spent time with friends looking through old photos from school, and I saw a picture of me and him and I was like "Oh, [This Guy], I wonder how he's doing." You see, I had kind of a crush on this guy but the timing wasn't right, I was all kinds of messed up and he's in the same fraternity with someone I was deeply involved with.. I think I referred to him as "The Stupid One" in this diary.. so I never took it seriously or acted upon it.

Which is fine, how many people do you meet in your life where you think that, and its no big deal. But how many of those people decide to get in touch with you years later?

And it's been fun, first talking via Facebook messaging and then "graduating" to texting. As time passed, my little crush on him kind of.. resurrected.. It's bad. It's almost like high school love bad, as in I'm smiling right now as I am thinking about it, and the next time my phone beeps my heartbeat will quicken and I'll feel this weird fuzziness inside.

Crazy, right? I catch myself and kind of go "wtf" how is it possible to feel this way when you've just been electronically flirting and haven't seen each other in years? But, you know what, I decided that instead of questioning and psychoanalyzing I'm just going to enjoy the ride. Only a few weeks ago I was telling a friend about how I'm bored, how I have nothing to think about in life, and just want something to ease my winter boredom.. and this is that something.

He lives in Ottawa. I live in Montreal. I travel for work. Next week I am traveling to Ottawa, for one night.

In university nothing happened because of timing, and now the timing of everything is so.. uncannily perfect..

So the plan is to see each other next week while I'm in the city. I'm a little anxious.. excited.. nervous.. It's been a long time since I merely looked forward to seeing someone like this. The last few dates I went on were with the attitude of "Whatever, why not, give him a chance, maybe you'll like him." But to already like (or at least, think I like??) someone going into it.. now that is intimidating.

I feel like I'm back in high school writing about my first ever date. Whatever. It's cute. Like I said, I'm just going to feel it, not apologize for it, and enjoy it. And pray that it will be a positive experience. That's all I want to say about that for now, for the fear of being a jinx..