Feel like I'm just biding my time until I get to Dubai. Life is boring. Same shit, different day. Wake up, have a coffee, go to work, go home. Sometimes, if I feel well enough and if my knee isn't too sore, I train or I play squash. Trying to get into morning yoga now that it is getting nicer out. Wishing my knee didn't hurt so damn much so I can be one of those crazy people doing 5k at 5am. Hopefully one day things will improve and I can be normal again.

That kind of normal, where I could train like a beast, it seems like it was so far away. Yet I can't let it go. I hope I can be back there someday.

My latest hobby has been DIY bath and body. I'm trying not to spend a fortune on essential oils and the like, since I've got about three more months left in England. I figure whatever I have left over I'll gift to people. It keeps me entertain in the evenings and on the weekends, having all these new little projects. I need to be entertained.

Torn between finding a new boy toy and not. I could use the attention, the entertainment. But I could also use the bramacharya, the introspective solitude. I would also like to avoid leaving yet another broken heart in my wake as I start my life over yet again.

It always happens like that doesn't it? You meet someone right before you leave for good. I know it all happens for a reason.. it's just pretty shitty. Let's not do that this time.

Sigh. Always thinking about boys. Different boys, in turn, always spinning.